To my creepy pervo neighbor

I don't like you. You look like someone who bathes once a week and watches porno 5 times a day. Just the thought of what you do one room away from my bedroom makes me want to gag.
Your daily visits to the pool during the summer aren't fooling anyone. You're white as a ghost and never bring any reading material with you. It's obvious to all the young girls why you go there. Just because you're wearing 1980's Tom Cruise sunglasses doesn't mean we magically can't see where you're looking. You are freaking creepy, thus is why you always sit alone and us girls stay a mile a way from you in fear that you will try to spark up a conversation.
Speaking of girls, I'm still in shock that you managed to get a girlfriend this last fall who is somewhat decent looking! How did you do it? You must keep the lights very dim in your apt. That must be your secret. Well kudos to you, creepy pervo neighbor, she's a real catch!
I also feel that I must tell you this- being that your bedroom is right next to mine, and that our cute little apartment complex was obviously built on a budget, I can hear EVERYTHING you say. I've very clearly heard conversations with your girlfriend (still in shock...) about you two contemplating anal sex.
I mean, discussing doing it, the pros, the cons.. the works. I could have happily lived my whole life without hearing that detailed discussion.
I've tried everything. Banging on the wall with my straightener, yelling "shut the hell up" into the wall, you've even forced me out of bed at 3:30 in the morning while your young bubbly girlfriend hooped and hollered at some new toy you bought. As if that wasn't bad enough, when I stormed over to your door in my pjs and mess of a hair, you answered the door in only your bed sheets.
Oh my God, could you be any creepier.

Also, please don't talk to my friends that come over, you're creeping them out now too.
"Hey man, you going in there? There's some freaking hot girls that live there!" ....Little did you know you were actually saying that to my boyfriend at the time. Smart. Real smart, creepy pervo neighbor.

You can bet that if I'm ever in need of a cup of sugar or flour, I will NOT be knocking on your door.

Congrats again on your new relationship, I hope she sticks around for a little bit before running for the hills.

I hate you, you slacker!

Those people who just do the bare minimum. That person who drives in the carpool lane to pass all the cars and then cuts them off at the front of the line. That person who tips $2 for their $50 meal. I hate you! What makes you so privileged that you get to do less than I'm doing??

I try to be fair and kind on a daily basis. There might be TONS of traffic on my way home from work everyday... but pretty sure it's just me in the car so I can't get in the carpool lane, no matter how much I would LOVE to pass everyone and get home sooner.

If you want in my lane, I'll let you in. I'm not going to sit there and say screw you just to be one car ahead. That's retarded. But if you just passed me and 100 other cars in traffic while you're in the carpool lane, Forget it. You're not getting in front of me! Bitch and moan all you want.

If I'm eating at a restaurant and I have a good server, I'll tip well. They deserve it! Obviously if they sucked at their job and rarely came by to see if I needed anything, of course I wouldn't tip as much. But I'm fair. But to you slackers, are you THAT cheap that you can't tip a few dollars more? These servers bust their ass, and believe it or not, yours isn't the only table they're waiting on.

Or how about the person at work who comes in late, leaves early, is sick ALL THE TIME and gets to stay home and get paid for it, when everyone knows they can't possibly be sick 36 days in 4 months. Unless you have some sort of disease, that's just not possible. Oh, you're working from home again?? Yea, ok, I totally believe you. Meanwhile, all of us normal hard working employees are here every day, sometimes working 12-14 hour days. We take a sick day when we're sick, and take vacation once or twice a year with advanced notice.

We're honest employees who don't take advantage of the company. I've worked with someone before who was the epitome of a slacker... and pretty sure they made about 10K a year more than me. I hate you people!

I don't care if you think you can be an a-hole slacker, I'm going to keep being nice to everyone and being fair and hopefully karma exists, because someday I'll be completely happy living in a cute little houes out in the country while you're working at McDonalds and stealing fries in between drive through customers. I hope you burn your hand with that fry grease! Ahole.

What is my generation's obsession with getting married?

Why do people my age think of marriage as a "goal"?

Shouldn't marriage be thought of as something that would make them happy, when the time is right? Not necessarily be something they should work towards?

Now, I have a few girlfriends that are both engaged, and this is nothing bad towards them, at all! I know that they're happy and the time is right for them. This rant is mainly aimed towards those whose idea of marriage is maybe an unhealthy one.

When I was 18 I thought for sure I'd be married by 25. Have kids in my late 20's.. and achieve the ultimate goal of caring for my family.
I was in a serious relationship from age 19 to 22, and thought.. well this just works out perfectly. We've been together 4 years now, lived together for a few years, I knew he had already talked to my father about the idea of marriage in our future. I had it all lined up to be married by 25.

I was set.

Our relationship went down south as we both grew older. I matured… and well… he didn’t. I remember even thinking at one point in time, “If we were married right now, we would be FORCED to work this out and everything would be fine again!” That’s an unhealthy and unrealistic view of marriage, but I wanted it SO badly at the time and knew FOR SURE it would make us happy again.

How can you have a mature outlook on marriage when you’re so young? You may think It’s mature thinking at the time.. but seriously, what do you really know about yourself at such a young age?
I’ve been going to therapy since my freshman year in high school. Not because I’m not a nutcase or anything, but I would go just to clear my head and have a mature, knowledgeable and confident person to offer constant guidance in my life.
My therapist has always told me to not even THINK about marriage until I was at least 30 years old. I’ve also read a book called “Passages”, which is a great book; I recommend it to anyone wanting to learn more about themselves. This book goes through each age group. Teens, early 20’s, late 20’s, early 30’s and so on.
To sum up the “predictable phase” of the early to mid 20s’, it states that in your early 20s’ you’ve most likely broken away from your parent’s shelter and are starting to build your own foundation. You also start learning more about yourself. Let’s face it, you’re not in High School anymore, you don’t have to worry about fitting in with the popular crowd. When you are not surrounded by the constant pressure of trying to change yourself to fit in, you are more apt to really be yourself and to accept and be proud of your uniqueness.
In your later 20’s, you’re more serious about your career and are actually wanting to work in a field you’re interested in, not “just a day job to pay the rent”.
Come your early 30’s, you may very well go through a time of total retransformation. Who you thought you were in your mid 20’s may stick, but in most cases will be thrown out the window. You finally start to get a realistic sense of life. I can’t say for sure that’s the case, as I’m only 24.. I’m just going off of what I’ve read, and am preparing myself for. If this is the case, and you marry at a very early age, what are the chances that you and your husband will be the same people in your 30’s? Will you still be able to talk things through like you used to? Will your once shy and reserved spouse suddenly get the urge to travel the world or take up riding Harley’s? And how will these changes affect your marriage?

After learning all of this, you have to ask yourself.. why are people from my generation so stuck on the obsession of getting married in their early 20’s?
Do they think it’s going to solve all of their problems? Or that since they are now legally together, they never again have to worry about the dreaded dating scene? Have you ever seen the movie Under the Tuscan Sun? I think that movie showsthat even if you’ve been married 20+ years, things can and most likely will change as you grow older. You could fall out of love, you or your spouse could come out of the closet and decide to start dating the same sex, its life: ANYTHING can happen. NOTHING is for sure.

I don’t want everyone to think that I’m putting down all who marry at an early age. When you know yourself well enough and you know it’s the right time… you know. I’m just saying, what’s the rush? You’ll still love each other just as much. I’ve heard of couples who have dated for 10 or 20+ years and are in no rush to get married. Look at Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell. They’ve been together for what seems like forever, but don’t NEED to get married to be happy. They’re happy just being together.

With all this said, my personal idea of marriage is living your life with someone that you can be completely open with, confide in with your innermost secrets, someone who makes you a better person and supports your goals, and most important to myself: someone to take care of and have take care of you as you get older and watch the world change. I know it sounds all whispy and dreamy and romantic, but I do also know it won’t be all happy times. I understand that something like marriage would take a lot of patience and learning. That’s exactly why I don’t take it as lightly as I used to.

I hope all of my ranting and random thoughts make sense to at least a few people and I haven’t pissed off anyone who got married at an early age. Just understand that I have a different view because I’m single right in the heart of learning about life.

That's all.

Impart Media Group, this is Brittany speaking

Woman: Can I speak to Rebecca?

Me: Yes, may I tell her who’s calling?

Woman: *Silence*

Me: Hello? Hello?

I hang up since shes gone silent miraciously.

***RING RING***

Me: Impart Media Group, this is Brittany speaking

Woman: Rebecca.

Me: Of course, may I tell her whos calling?

Woman: (In a bitchy freaking tone) No you may not!

This was several days ago.... she just called back again, and we did the same damn thing....
Listen bitch. Pretty sure i’m just doing my job. You wanna talk to Rebecca? Stop calling the main fucking line and call her direct line!! You think I LIKE answering the phones here and talking to bitches like you?? NO NO I DONT!
You can be sure I’ll be kindly giving her Rebeccas direct number next time she calls. Seriously, what a bitch! I really hope she never tries coming to the office, i’ll say a few words to her.
Maybe she’s a superhero and can’t tell me her real identity?.... No? Just a thought.

Don’t call here again you wannabe superhero.

To whomever towed my car this morning...

REALLY?? Was that necessary?

I have lived in this complex for over 4 years and have NEVER seen your car where I parked last night! I, myself, had never even parked there until about 1am this morning, when I could not find a spot anywhere else and thought, well shoot, this one time won't hurt! But you were kind enough to present me with your own little magic show, weren't you? One minute my car is there, the next it's gone! Poof! Man, aren't you clever.

Now don't get me wring, I can totally understand how inconvenient it must have been for you to come home after 1am and see my car parked in your spot, but you couldn't have left a kind note informing me that you rent that spot?- You had to go straight to TOWING MY CAR?? One word for ya.. KARMA.

I would also like to thank you for causing me to take out $250 from my hard earned vacation fund for my little adventure this morning. That, also, whas very thoughtful of you. :o)

I'm sure glad to have people like you to be my neighbor!

Thanks again and take care!

-Your fellow redmond ridge resident.

To Match.com: You are a liar, and I hate you.

To Match. com:
I hate you. I hate your ads. I hate that you make me feel like I am missing something in my life, just because I wake up by myslef and don't have water fights outside with a garden hose or get hot and steamy in the library.
I especially hate your ad with the couple waking up together and having a friendly morning talk, while the girl get s a back rub from her oh so hot boyfriend.
Screw you, Match.com.
That guy is only being so sweet because he is getting paid from your retarded company. Any normal guy would lay in bed until the very last second, and therefor would not have time for such a romantic and quaint chat.

God I hate you, Match.com

When all else fails, you still have family

As my astrological forcast predicted, I have had one heck of a year so far.. fingers crossed though.. we're coming up quickly to November when hopefull I will no longer be "mentally disturbed."

In the past, whenever I've had an emotional meltdown and needed a shoulder to cry on, I had a boyfriend who would listen to me vent and rub my shoulders to relieve my stress. It always helped, and it was a good feeling, knowing I would have someone like like to turn to when I thought I was going crazy.

Since my breakup with my last seriouls boyfriend, I've never felt more alone. Having to do all these things on my own while trying to hold myself together emotionally has been.. well.. a roller coaster ride.

Only recently did I come to the realization that no matter where I am in life, even if my heart has recently been broken, if a close friend has died, I will ALWAYS have my family. I never have to second guess that they will be there for me. They know me, they know my strengths, weaknesses, and dreams.

I've somehow always overlooked them. But it's one of the best feelings to know that I have them, and always will.

A big THANKS to my family. Couldn't do it without you.